Written By: Victor Miller (character of Jason Voorhees), Todd Farmer
Starring: Kane Hodder, Lexa Doig, Lisa Ryder, Chuck Campbell, Jonathan Potts,
Peter Mensah, Melyssa Ade, Todd Farmer, Melody Johnson, Derwin Jordan,
David Cronenberg, Dov Tiefenbach, Kristi Angus, Boyd Banks, Amanda Brugel
Rated: R ( Violence / Language / Nudity )
Running Time: 100 Min.
Jason X is a bad movie. No, Jason X is a VERY bad movie. I'm sure this comes as no surprise to anyone. What surprised me was that Jason X was bad, yet not bad enough to be good. Sometimes, seeing a supremely awful film can be quite entertaining. You go with friends, laugh and make fun of the movie, then wonder why all those people listed on the end-credits never realized what an incredible cinematic blunder they were making! Other bad movies are made by people who know exactly what they're doing, by intentionally creating camp-cinema. (See the work being churned out by Troma Films for many excellent examples!) While the Friday the 13th series began as camp-cinema (literally, ha...), I had figured that this tenth episode in the indestructible saga of Jason Voorhees would be a self-mocking one. I was wrong; horribly, horribly wrong.
After watching Jason X, I was a bit mystified as to why I didn't really hate the film quite enough to have actually enjoyed it. Then my friend Matt made a keen observation. "It had too much plot.", he said. Whoa... that's it! Yes, sometimes less is more, as Jason's riveting personality so grandly demonstrates. What this movie needed was less of a story! Sure, you can put a bunch of young female medical students in tight sweaters on a runaway spaceship in the year 2455, just waiting to have casual sex and get sliced and diced by Mecha-Jason, but bog them down with dialogue and all that goes to waste!!!
If you must know something about the story, other than the fact that it blatantly rips off much from the Alien series of films, here goes: Jason is captured at the beginning, then escapes, kills a bunch of people, gets cryogenically frozen for over 400 years, is found by a bunch of science students (all oddly dressed as Tusken Raiders from Star Wars), is taken to a spaceship, gets thawed out, escapes, kills a bunch of people, (plot point omitted), kills a bunch of people, (more plot omitted), kills a bunch of people. Included, of course, are the required academic idiots who want Jason captured alive for study and profit, various sexually active teens, and only one person who attempts to warn the others how dangerous the big guy is, though no one listens to her until after the carnage has begun. Everyone talks too much, except for Jason himself. (Jason's the smart one!)
There were a few moments in Jason X that hinted at its potential for supreme badness (Jason's version of a pillow-fight), but alas, it was all too little, too late. Such a shame, really, as this is most likely the last of the Friday the 13th films. Well, then again, perhaps that's not such a bad thing after all. Which movie genre will Jason take a stab at next? Now, there's a thought too terrifying to even contemplate!